Take care of yourself

This may seem like a difficult task for many parents of a chronically ill child. Our first instinct is to ignore whatever complaints we might have and focus on our child.

However, it is very important for parents to take care of themselves. They must get the rest and nourishment they need in order to have the energy required to care for their child. Parents who are exhausted and stressed-out often have a difficult time making good decisions regarding their child's care and are often unable to provide quality support to their child.

Parents must find someone (e.g., a close friend, a clergy member, a counselor, or a support group) to whom they can talk about their concerns, anxieties, and fears. It is critical that parents look after their own physical and mental health for the benefit of their whole family.

Children are very perceptive. They know when their parents are upset or worried. If parents of a chronically ill child let their worries and anxieties show, they run the risk of increasing their child's anxieties. Children follow their parents' example on how to react to difficult situations.

If parents are not handling the stress well, then the chances are great that their child will also have problems coping. For the sake of your family, talk things out with a trusted friend, counselor, or clergy.

Skills List

1. Learn about your child’s illness and treatment
2. Commmunicate openly with your children
3. Help your child learn to cope with life changes
4. Help your other children, spouse and extended family cope
5. Prepare your child for procedures and hospitalization
6. Maintain as much normalcy as possible
7. Set limits, and provide discipline
8. Continue normal expectations for your child
9. Communicate with your child’s school
10. Help your child explain the illness to others
11. Accept help graciously
12. Empower your child
13. Help your child find a buddy with the same illness
14. Handle (unsolicited) advice 
15. Take care of yourself

 

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For more information, please contact:

Kathy Davis, MSEd, PhD
kdavis2@kumc.edu
(913) 588-6305