Continue to have normal expectations and require your child to take responsibility
at home, school and in life
“Normal” is a word that keeps cropping up in this section! Perhaps more than anything,
the quest for normalcy will enable your family to continue to grow and flourish
during your child’s treatment and periods of health challenge. Similar to limit
setting and discipline, responsibility must remain as consistent as possible for
your child. Chores at home, homework, helping grandparents, babysitting – each of
these activities is critical to your child’s normal growth and development.
Your child is likely struggling to identify “who” she is since the diagnosis or
as she faces health challenges. Normal expectations will help her identify herself
in a positive way. Doing chores will help her recognize that she is still an important
part of the family. Doing school work will highlight that she is student, expected
to progress and achieve. Participating in life by helping others, attending scouts
or church, playing with friends or otherwise participating in life will enable her
to see that she is still who she was prior ot the diagnosis or the current health
challenge.
Naturally, judgment must be used in assigning chores that the child with a chronic
illness can do successfully. School work should be tailored to meet the student’s
physical abilities, while ensuring key concepts are covered. Discipline and limit
setting should enter into the picture if the child does not take responsibility
seriously. Parents should also remember to acknowledge and offer praise for chores
that have been done well.
Skills List
- Learn about your child’s illness and treatment
- Commmunicate openly with your children
- Help your child learn to cope with life changes
- Help your other children, spouse and extended family cope
- Prepare your child for procedures and hospitalization
- Maintain as much normalcy as possible
- Set limits, and provide discipline
- Continue normal expectations for your child
- Communicate with your child’s school
- Help your child explain the illness to others
- Accept help graciously
- Empower your child
- Help your child find a buddy with the same illness
- Handle (unsolicited) advice
- Take care of yourself
For more information, please contact:
Kathy Davis, MSEd, PhD
kdavis2@kumc.edu
(913) 588-6305