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Support your child as she learns to deal with the diagnosis and cope with the changes in her life

Support your child as she learns to deal with the diagnosis and cope with the changes in her life. Children react very differently to the diagnosis of a chronic illness. Some kids act very strong, and even say that the diagnosis does not bother them. Others are very emotional, displaying anger, sadness or extreme changes in behavioral responses.

"...And you thought you were having a bad hair day."There is no way to predict which way your child may respond. However, all kids will need lots of support, understanding and help in learning to cope with a chronic illness. They will be experiencing things that most children do not have the skills to deal with unless they have strong support.Listening to your child, talking about her feelings, and allowing your child to express her feelings openly are some of the best medicine your child will receive. You know your child better than anyone, and are the best person to care for her emotional needs. At times, this may be hard for you because you, too, are working hard to cope with the diagnosis.

Remember that it is okay for you to cry with your child or to express your frustration with the situation. Balance these conversations with others that are filled with laughter and positive feelings. Your child simply needs to know that you do not blame her and that you will work through things as a team. Your child’s feelings about the illness will likely change from time to time. This is why it is important to keep the lines of communication open at all times.

Skills List

  1. Learn about your child’s illness and treatment
  2. Commmunicate openly with your children
  3. Help your child learn to cope with life changes
  4. Help your other children, spouse and extended family cope
  5. Prepare your child for procedures and hospitalization
  6. Maintain as much normalcy as possible
  7. Set limits, and provide discipline
  8. Continue normal expectations for your child
  9. Communicate with your child’s school
  10. Help your child explain the illness to others
  11. Accept help graciously
  12. Empower your child
  13. Help your child find a buddy with the same illness
  14. Handle (unsolicited) advice 
  15. Take care of yourself


For more information, please contact:

Kathy Davis, MSEd, PhD
kdavis2@kumc.edu
(913) 588-6305